be new:

To be thin is to be beautiful, to feel beautiful, to be happy, to be new. 新しいになります。 I hope, someday, to see myself as others see me, and to be as light and happy as the leaves that blow in the wind or a beautiful balloon drifting up into the clouds...












Welcome
Hullo my little blueberry tea cups! ^__^ Thankyu for reading and being a part of my life. You help me so much. You give me more strength, determination, inspiration than if I were to be dealing with this alone and no one to speak of it to. I love and appreciate every one of you deeply! I hold each of you dear to my heart.

BEFORE JUDGING, PLEASE READ

ps.- I do not teach or wish to inspire eating disorder for it is a sickenss, not something that can be learnt. Eating disorder midset is something one is cursed with that most likely progresses slowly over the years of one's life: appearing first as a simple diet, moving forward in the form of ednos, and possibly, sadly hitting many full on as anorexia/bulimia. If you do not agree with blogs or people that support the lifestyle of the eating disordered, please leave. This blog is not for you. Please do not judge me b'coz I support others through their difficultiesor b'coz I seek support myself, for we need friends and people to talk to about our problems just as you do. Please do not proceed to tell me what I am doing is wrong, I am unhealthy, I am going to die, I need to gain weight, etc. I know what I am and what I am doing, it is not for you or anyone to tell me. I mean no disrespect for any concern; however, gaining weight and simply eating will not help me. It will make me sicker by causing mental torments.

Sunday, May 30, 2010

YAY! hats, clothes and 1944 literature

it was neat, his mom took me with her to goodwill and she bought me some clothes and stuf ^__^ i got several tops, 2 skirts, some socks 3 summer hats, 3 baseball caps (im a hat person ^//^ i collect them), some belts and a wonderful book!!! im a SUCKER for old books! :D it was made in 1944, smells wonderfully like old books. its called "The Listening House" by Mabel Seeley. aaand!!! another thing that makes today EVEN awesomer is that i only ate twice today and its 5:30p! and it wasnt cuz i wasnt hungry, boy was i! i just told myself "ah, i dont need it" =) and when i was eating my toast, i play around on the computer while i eat and i drink water too, so i take a bite here and there and i kinda just didnt want it after i finished the 3rd piece. so, i threw it away ^__^ i hope i can keep it up!!! i dont want anymore binge episodes! ill post the rest of my food intake later today.


1/4c Honey Nut Cheerios: 110cal 12:00p
1/4 sclie toast: 45cal 5:00p
1/4 of 1tsp strawberry jelly: 13cal 5:00p



832cal under
168cal eaten






hunger is just a feeling, it will pass.

i dont have to eat everytime i feel my tummy growl.

satisfy tummy growl=tummy growth

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